Monday, March 21, 2011

The ones we don't adopt....

Here is a bit of my heart for the kids left in foster care...... The hard to place....the ones with issues..... This is how it might look to them

"I was working outside on the garden today (obviously not written today as the rain is falling!) and I started thinking again about the reasons we have for not adopting particular 'hard to place' children. I imagined what one of those unadopted children might say to us if we ran into them later in life.What would they do? Would they smile weakly and offer the words that we offer others as our justification for living safe and not bringing 'them' into our families. Or would their hearts cry out to us even as adults? Here is my thinking on how one conversation might go......

"I understand that you couldn't make room -
that there wasn't a place,
I was not of your womb.
That my age was all wrong,
and my history belonged,
to a place and a people you know have all gone.

I see in your eyes that my life was a chore,
that my needs were too big,
my emotions to raw.

That you were afraid I might never leave home,
or I might find anger and by failure be known.
That my heart was too broken
my mind was too slow,
That the drugs in my system
defined me, you know.

And maybe, just maybe,
I wouldn't love you -
for my mind was too battered
too deep were the wounds.

But I wish you had tried,
I wish you had found room,
For this one tiny boy who
so achingly stood
and looked in the windows and watched
as you prayed,
and asked the Lord Jesus
to move you each day.

To bring out the family
that He had prepared
but none came forward
as I stood lonely there.

I understand - that man would say
my childhood has slipped away.
I have a father, this is true,
I know the same strong God as you.

But I wish that I had, had a mom -
a brother, a sister, a dog, some lawn.
That you had tried to reach me there
not left me to my own despair.

To people who were paid to feed,
and paid to wash and paid to read.
To those who didn't stay too long
and those who chose to teach me wrong.

I wish,
that you had found a way
to wedge me in and let me stay."

Reposted from urban servant

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Life is good.

So am exhausted, but a good exhausted . I spent last week working a clothing turn about , I was also able to get a compleat spring and summer wardrobe for each of the kids . ( I spent 280 total for 6 wardrobes, in cluding bathing suits and shoes and Easter outfits... And more cute clothing then they really need :) ) and if you know my love of clothing and a great deal you know this was awesome! I was also able to put some bags of clothing together for a family that lost everything in a fire 2 weeks ago.
I am happy to report that Zion had his evaluation , and even though they gave him a developmental / over all age of about 17 m.......this has been one of the best weeks we have had in forever! We moved him out of his crib and he is in a car toddler bed....... Well to all the skeptics out there.... He has slept in the bed for 3 nights and 2 naps and has slept throughout the night 2 nights in a row. ( he hasn't done that in over a year) I am starting to wonder if he felt trapped or boxed in in the crib ? What ever the reaso Iam thrilled.
He has also started to communicate better using 2 & 3 words together. He also played for 20 min. With Eden that didn't end with her in tears( and that is huge for her even if everything goes her way!)
So Eden is now ..... Well still banging her head. she mainly does it asa self soothing way of getting to sleep. Funny thing is she doesnt need to be by her self to do it. she will bang her head into your cheesy if she is tired , or upset and it hurts. The issue lies in that she is now doing it hard enough to leave a bruse on her forehead . so back to the neurologist we will go, she is due for an MRI anyway.
And Faith well she is just trucking on , growing good, cute as ever!
The older 3 are doing great! We are throwing around the idea of cyber school for them next year! We will try a test run over spring break to see if we can get a set # of assignments done each day ...... We shall see.

and last but not least we are on the path to adoption once again .......... Before the comment start flying we are just putting our home study out there and allowing God to bring the child/children that are to be Rogers to us! ...... And there is still no contract for the surogacy so we are in a holding pattern there also..... But I know God is in control of all of this!

So that is us in a nut shell right now